Perfection Rant–What do you think?

Posted on 02. Mar, 2010 by Becky in Love Your Body

So, recently, I was reading a good friend’s blog.  This friend is a writer, even though she doesn’t know it.  She’s got great voice, a great sense of humor, and strong opinions.  So her latest blog post was a rant on women, particularly Utah women, and I asked her if I could quote her on my blog.  So, here is some of what she had to say:

“One of the biggest perfection problems I have noticed, especially recently, is people’s need for the perfect body. I don’t know if this is news to most people or not, and it may come be too much for some, so maybe you should sit down before you read this, “There is no such thing as a perfect body.” Shocker right?! Honestly, I have met so many people since I’ve lived here, who have this unrealistic idea of achieving a perfect body, and it doesn’t exist. In fact, find me someone who claims to have a perfect body, and I will show you a flaw. That’s life. And it ruins lives when people think that such an achievement is possible. There is a fine line between people wanting a perfectly healthy body, and people wanting their healthy body to be perfect, and it’s the latter who end up more stressed, more upset, more anxious, and more unhappy, because they are trying to achieve the impossible.
Here’s why: you could always be skinnier, you could always be more tan, you could always have whiter or straighter teeth, you could always have better definition, a better hairstyle, a different face (thank you plastic surgery), bigger/smaller breasts, you can even have a sculpted hind-end, which I am saving my money for. Kidding . You could always be something better, but you will kill yourselves trying to get there. I know what it’s like to have that mindset, momentarily. It’s stressful, and ruthless, and completely consuming.
Don’t get me wrong— I love the idea of being healthy– I want to be healthy for my family, kids, future grandkids- for my husband, but mostly for myself, because it feels good, and because I feel good. That doesn’t mean I’m spending my days working myself out to death, or jumping on the scale and depressing myself over what weight I think I should be. I don’t spend every meal calculating the calories I’m eating and worrying if I’ve exercised enough to be able to eat something I want, and I don’t beat myself over the head for not having time to work out every now and again, because to me, that’s crazy. Here’s what I think— I want to be healthy enough to be able to walk to Missouri if needed in the later days, but not large enough that I’m the first people want to kill on that trip because of the meals I could provide. Moderation.”

So here’s my take on Stephanie’s rant:  I think she’s got great perspective here.  I think she is right on about the WHY of having a healthy body.  You can’t have a healthy spirit until you are living healthy for YOU because it makes YOU feel good.  Not to fit into a certain size, not to look better than your neighbor, not to impress your husband or your old friends from high school.  It has to be because it makes YOU happy.  And it will!

I do understand what Stephanie is saying about Utah culture (this problem certainly didn’t exist in the Wisconsin community I grew up in), but I don’t think it’s entirely a Utah thing.  I think we have a pretty homogenous population here.  Many of us share the same values, the same standards, the same beliefs, the same lifestyle;  we’re bound to look similar as well.  To me, it’s not that we look similar, it’s about WHY we look similar.  If I look like my neighbor because I am trying to compete with them or out-do them, then that’s a sad statement (especially for a grown adult who should have so much more to live for).  If I look like my neighbor because I just happen to look like my neighbor then, who cares?  It would be just as pathetic for me to NOT look like my neighbor just to make a point to be different.  It shouldn’t be about trying to be the same or trying to be different.  At some point, we should just be who we are because that’s who we are, and it should have nothing to do with what anyone else is doing or thinking.  And people that tend to have a problem with perfection are often worrying more about appearing perfect to everyone else, and that’s where the problem really stems from.  Worrying about impressing people.  That’s where the stress comes from.  So that’s my rant in return.

So, what do you think about what she has to say?

Do you see this as a problem for women everywhere, or is Utah alone in breeding perfection-obsessed women?

Do you find her opinions offensive, or do you think she’s right on?

For Stephanie’s full rant on Utah women and perfection, check out her blog.  Be prepared to laugh, to cry, and to possibly feel a little miffed.  All great writers push the envelope a little.